Past

Masa lalu itu apa? masa, waktu yang telah berlalu, yang udah terlewati, yang gak akan keulang lagi..
Kadang, kalo lagi diem gue suka flashback, nginget suatu masa dimana gue ngerasa bahagia. suatu masa yang susah buat dilupain.. bukan cuma satu moment, tapi banyakkkkk.. kadang pengen rasanya bisa ngulang kejadian itu..
tadi, gue iseng buka inbox hape gue, baca sms-sms dulu..
ada beberapa sms dari salah satu temen gue, temen yang dekeeeeeeet banget saat itu. dia lucu, kocak, seru, rame dan setiap yang dia ngomong hampir selalu bikin gue pengen ketawa. sekarang, dia beda, dia berubah sikapnya ke gue. bukan dia yang dulu lagi, gaya becandanya udah lain, gak perhatian lagi sama gue. sedih. ketika gue bacain smsnya, rasanya? kangeeeeen banget saat saat itu :'(

sempet kebaca beberapa sms ucapan bday ke gue yang belum gue hapus.. sedih. gue kangeeen mereka.. yang dulu.. jujur, gue kangen banget saat saat dimana banyak orang yang begitu perhatian sama gue.

sekarang, gue kesepian. gue ngerasa sendirian. gue punya temen, tapi gue belum nemu yang bener-bener temen. gue punya temen, tapi kayak gak punya temen. kemaren-kemaren gue jalan-jalan sendirian kayak orang linglung. pengen nonton tapi gak ada temen. hiks. sedih. banget. rasanya.

kalo lagi di luar, di keumunan, gue sering ngerasa sendirian di keramaian.

mungkin gue musti berbuat lebih baik lagi ke orang lain supaya orang juga baik sama gue..

This. Feeling.

Helloooo Guys!

In this moment, I wanna share my feeling. Actually, I don’t really know what I feel right now. I feel so alone in this crowded world. How come? I feel like there’s no one who truly cares for me except my beloved parent and yes, my brother.

Recently, I just known that one of my friends was lying to me. Oh God, it hurts. He is my close friend. We often share many things about our life. But, I can say that it doesnt exist anymore. He left me. He lost in cyberworld. Well, he is famous in a social network, so you know that many people want to be his friend moreover he is kind, funny and smart. Someday, I opened his profile. I saw a thread and read it. I got that he’s close to all of his friends, it’s ok for me but one thing that I can’t accept. He said A to me, but he said B to them. Oh well, this wasn’t important at all. But you know how’s your feeling when someone lied you?

Hmm.. and I wanna say sorry to my dearest friend. I’m sorry, you may feel that I don’t care anymore to you or whatever it called. I’m so sorry if you feel that I a lil bit stay away from you. I' m sorry for all my mistakes. you are my bestfriend, you're the one who cheer me up when there's no one care about me. I don't know why, I don't know what, I'm sorry if this hurts you. something changes me. I hope we can still be friend. I'm sorry, A.

and separation, two of my friends. they will move to another college. I'm so sad. you know, they may not my closest friends but they are my friend. I'll be missing you :')

okay, that's some feeling that I can share now. May be next time I'll tell you more.

much Love :*